Encouragement Along the Way

It’s cycling season again. Spending long miles on the saddle of my trusty bike, I often fall into deep contemplation. I’ve written before about the camaraderie of a shared experience and how good it feels to be part of a community where people aren’t so focused on differences. Just the fact that we’re doing this thing we love together, it connects us for a time.

I guess I think a lot about community because of the deeply divided times we inhabit. For me it’s a particularly painful thing because I truly believe we’re all on the same ride (maybe just taking different routes), and will function better when we accept there is no legitimate “us vs. them.” Sadly, that possibility feels further away than ever.

Part of my contemplation on my recent long Delta ride was about the people who came out to cheer on riders. People lined the streets of Greenwood, MS, clapping and encouraging riders as we made our way out of town. That’s a fun boost to the beginning of a long ride.

But this year, in some particularly remote area along the route back, a family came out on their side-by-side and parked by the road. As I came into view they began to cheer and tell me I was doing a good job. It was like a little rest stop for the soul. I beamed and thanked them and told them I really needed that. And I really did.

As I continued on my way, a little more determined with that uplift, I considered their generosity, because that’s what it was. They made an effort and gave me something meaningful. And hopefully it gave them something too, offering encouragement to tired cyclists on a lonely stretch of Delta road. They saw us not as some random weirdo on a bike slowing down their road, but as fellow humans worthy of encouragement.

I then thought bigger picture and how nice it would be if we did that more readily in society. If we just encouraged other people. Whether we know it or not, most people we encounter are likely doing hard things. What if we lived in a society where we cheered each other on, even just internally, rather than ignored each other or tore each other down?

I get it, it would be strange to pass by a random person and say, “You’ve got this!,” “You’re doing great!,” “You’re getting closer!,” “Way to go!” But is it any stranger than how we reflexively ask “How are you?” (when maybe we don’t want to really know), and the response being, “I’m fine,” (even if they’re really not)? We’ve already proven we can normalize certain social interactions, so why not ones that lift each other up?

What if we could somehow normalize encouragement? To do so, I think we’d have to see each others not as competitors but as teammates. And, for me, I believe that’s what we truly are. I think life is a ride, not a race, and that we all do better when we all do better.

So I think it starts with shifting our own perception of how we see each other. Instead of that person ahead of me in line fumbling with coupons slowing me down, they’re a fellow human navigating their own challenges. Instead of that person driving in front of me being an obstacle, they’re someone trying to get somewhere safely too. When I make that shift, those small moments of patience or understanding become my own quiet form of encouragement.

I’m going to make a better effort to offer encouragement to others. No, I don’t intend to cheer when someone walks by me, but I can remember that each someone I encounter is a member of this team of humanity and hope that they get where they’re going in one piece and with peace. The road out here can get tough sometimes and I genuinely want us all to make it to the finish line.